Blue’s Clues

This post is part of the Other Mother’s Freedom to Marry Blog Carnival!

I had a hard time thinking of my blue post. I thought my something blue could be my toenails, now polished a lovely navy; I thought it could be me, saddened because we don’t all have the right to define our relationships as we would like. Ellison suggested it could refer to untreated depression in same-sex partners who don’t have access to mental health services because they are disproportionately uninsured…but she’s a little wonkier than this blog.

But then I got to thinking about the election, and how much of our population lives in blue states (this is a US map where the sizes of states are adjusted by population). And how we now have a Democratic President who used to support full marriage equality. And I just started getting upset – more red than blue – about what’s taking so darn long.

I’ve been involved in this fight for 12 years now, and it feels like forever.

But then I take a deep breath and I remember that real change goes slowly, that really changing hearts and minds is tedious and time consuming work, and that it has long term impact. So my something blue is a calm commitment to keep having the difficult conversations, embracing the teachable moments, gritting my teeth and grinning in the face of homophobia and heterosexism, and giving some GREEN to keep the work going. I’m so inspired with all the posts I’ve been reading, and clearer than ever that the impact of marriage discrimination goes far beyond same-sex couples who want to get married. So let’s keep working together, keep laughing and crying and holding on, and keep our eyes on the prize: Equality.

2 responses to “Blue’s Clues

  1. I come to say to you this afternoon, however difficult the moment, however frustrating the hour, it will not be long, because “truth crushed to earth will rise again.”
    How long? Not long, because “no lie can live forever.”
    How long? Not long, because “you shall reap what you sow.”
    How long? Not long:

    Truth forever on the scaffold,
    Wrong forever on the throne,
    Yet that scaffold sways the future,
    And, behind the dim unknown,
    Standeth God within the shadow,
    Keeping watch above his own.

    How long? Not long, because the arc of the moral universe is long, but it bends toward justice.

    ~ Martin Luther King, Jr.

  2. Thank you for this. I spent a long night last night at the RI state house listening to testimony on marriage bills – I *think* this was my 12th time in 13 years. Before I went I just kept thinking, “I have nothing new to say, and I can’t listen to the same morally and intellectually bankrupt arguments about the decline of society and the downfall of the family.” But I went and stood with many, many like minded people, many of whom came out for the first time, and was renewed.

    True progress is slow, but lasting.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s